Even though Emma is just over three months, motherhood has been so much easier this second time around and I feel like I've been rocking it. Having more knowledge, experience, and an easier baby have made it a whole new world (did you sing that to the Aladdin tune? I typed it to the tune and we've been watching it a ton in our house). So many fears have been quieted, I know what skills to put to use with each cry, and nursing has been awesome. I'm still going with no tears shed! That alone is an accomplishment in and of itself. However, there are a few things that haven't changed and I thought I'd share them with anyone who is expecting or thinking of adding to their brood.
1. The fear of SIDS
With Ellie, I checked constantly for fear of SIDS. She wasn't a sleeper so anytime she slept more than 20 minutes I checked repeatedly that she was breathing. Emma is a sleeper so it totally freaked me out at first, now I may only check a few times a week, but the fear is still there. Sometimes you do everything right, you read all the books, you take the precautions and terrible things still happen. I hope and pray that this never happens and if she hasn't moved or made a peep I may go into her room for a closer look, a finger under her nose to feel for warm breath, and I may or may not have poked her a time or two.
2. Red lights
Emma loves car rides, but if you stay stopped for too long she gets upset. It's inconvenient and you have to tap the brakes and creep to every red light to try and keep the car moving for as long as possible before coming to a complete stop. On a terrible day, you even think about the risk if you just ran that stop sign, just once to make it home with a content infant. I totally forgot about this, until Emma was here and my girlfriends and I all laughed about it.
3. Late night diaper changes
You're tired, your eyes are half open, your contacts are dry as a desert, and you contemplate the 12 hours leak free design your diapers brand promises. It sucks and they are no fun and did not get better the second time around. Included in this as a part b if you will, is blow outs. They also suck.
4. Pumping is the pits
When it comes to feeding your child, I pass no judgment. Nurse, pump, bottle feed, formula, you choose what's best and works for your family. With both of my girls, I've been able to breastfeed them and although it's going so much better this second time around (due to an increase in my supply), pumping still sucks. I hate it. I haven't been as diligent or strict about it this time because I just loathe doing it. I've even woken Emma up to nurse just long enough to keep me comfortable and save me from pumping and I am a strong believer in never waking a baby. Having to tote your pump with you when you're away, storing milk, washing all of the parts, and having to make sure everything you wear is pump friendly is just the pits. I'm thankful we have breast pumps in this day and age and I'm glad I don't have to hand express, but I still find it all terribly inconvenient and hate doing the task every day.
5. The speed of time
It still goes by lightning fast. Knowing how quickly it went by with Eleanor, I tried extra hard to relish in the moments, but they still slipped right through my fingers just as fast, if not faster. This is one of the saddest parts of parenting, it just goes by so quickly. Ellie is getting so big and I know that the time when she'll no longer fit on my lap or be too big to pick up is just around the corner. It breaks my heart to know that she's not always going to be small enough for me to carry her. It's no different the second time, every day Emma gets bigger and new milestones are achieved. Both my girls will be off to college in what I'm sure will feel like a blink of an eye.
These are my top things that didn't get better or easier with experience. Being a parent is so fulfilling, but there's things that just don't change no matter how many times you've done it. I wish I could wave a magical wand and and make the tough times easier, the inconvenient things convenient, and time last longer. What are some things you thought would be different with a second child?