5 Things To Do Before Baby Arrives

Thank you Dreft purtouch for sponsoring this post, all opinions are of my own and based on my experience.

I’m well over halfway now with my last pregnancy! How did it go by so quickly? My mind is blown with everything I want to get done before our little guy joins the team. I’ve been making to-do lists, crossing my Ts and dotting my Is, and thankfully I think I have everything set in place. Of course, I still have some time before his arrival, but I prefer to be prepared. I’m a planner and it works best for me and my stress level if I can plan and prepare a few steps ahead! Welcoming a new baby into the family can be a huge change for everyone and I have a few tips I want to share that can make that change easier.

Road Trip Essentials for Baby and Toddler!

This shop has been compensated by Collective Bias, Inc. and its advertiser. All opinions are mine alone. #SuperAbsorbent #CollectiveBias

In the upcoming month, we have a family trip planned for Washington and we’ve been looking forward to this trip forever! We’ll be visiting family on both sides and have lots of activities planned for our stay. One thing that’s been on my mind for the trip is a 4+ hour drive we’ll be making from one stay with family to another. Our girls are great in the car, but this will be our longest ride with them both. I've been worried about what to bring with us, for the trip and the road trip, and the obvious items are easy- diapers, snacks, extra clothes, but what else?

10 Things I Always Tell My Children

Becoming a mother is one job I've always wanted. Playing house was my favorite game, I loved watching kids, I had to hold every baby I met, and I couldn't wait to join the sweet inner circle of motherhood. I've always read a lot of articles about parenthood, even while in high school. I just wanted to do it "right", to do the best that I could to give my children the best of me. I'm in no way a perfect parent and I never will be, but I hope to give my children what they need from me. I think it's important to be intentional and I think a lot about the words I use when I talk to my girls, what messages I want to share with them, what actions I can take to guide them, love them, build their self-esteem, and teach them. There's so, so, so many things I want for my children, it's truly and endless list, but these 10 phrases below are something I tell them often. 

1. I love you
This is a given for any parent, but I make sure to tell them every single day, multiple times. I want to ensure my children know that I will love them no matter what. No matter their choices, their lifestyle, or anything I will always love them unconditionally. I never want them to think that something they choose to do will make me love them any less or that they can’t come with me with a problem. I will always love them and I want them to know that.

2. Don’t give up, keep trying!
When Eleanor first starts something, she can get frustrated that it’s not right or she can’t do it right away. I always encourage her to keep trying to keep going and she’ll eventually get it. Life is hard, and I want my children to be able to face their challenges and not be discouraged if it’s not right the first time.

3. Please / Thank you
Not only do I want to teach my children manners, but I want them to speak with respect and kindness. I don’t want them to expect things to be given or done for them, but to ask politely and to show appreciation to others.

4. I’m sorry / I forgive you
Everyone makes mistakes, I’m not a perfect person, friend, wife, or mother. If I’ve done something wrong, I want to make it right, especially to those I love. When my patience is short, when I raise my voice, I talk to my girls. I’ve apologized and talked to them and when the situation is the other way around, I talk to them about their actions. They’re little, but they’re smart. They know and understand so much more than what they can verbalize.

5. It’s ok to feel ____
One lesson I’m trying to teach Ellie is that she is in control of her actions and her emotions do not control her. How she feels is important, and it’s ok for her to feel any emotion she is feeling. I want her to know that how she feels is important to me and she doesn’t need to be sorry that she feels one way or another. When she’s had a tantrum, I’ve told her “It’s ok to be mad. It’s ok to be mad at mommy. It’s not okay to yell.” We’re practicing positive ways to express herself. It’s a lesson I’m sure will take years to learn and she’s not going to master it in her toddler years, but I want her to know that how she feels is valid and to be able to make the right decisions and actions for each situation instead of letting her emotions control her.

6. I’m proud of you
Telling your child that you're proud of them boosts their confidence, lets them feel loved, and it's so easy to do! "You're an amazing sister!", "You did that so fast, that's awesome!", "You did a great job sharing today at play time!". Look for the good and you'll find it! When we've had a great day together, and we're talking over dinner time, I'm always sure to brag to my husband about what great thing we did that day- showing kindness, good listening, obeying, etc. Her face just lights up and she gets the biggest smile. 

7. It’s your choice
We give Ellie a several choices to make each day so she can learn to make decisions on her own and to feel empowered. We do a lot of “this or that” and “if, then” questions. We also follow through with consequences when she makes the wrong decision. We do this to teach her to take responsibility for her actions and to build her confidence in decision making. It might seem like a lot for a toddler, but these questions at this time mostly refer to clothing and food choices.

8. You’re beautiful
Children have so many wonderful, amazing qualities and abilities, and there's so much we want to teach them, and one of those things I want to teach my children is that they're beautiful. I think they're absolutely perfect in every way and I want them to feel confident about their looks and their bodies. The world can be full of so much judgment and as girls they're subject to so much ridicule, looks aren't everything, but I want them to have a positive opinion of themselves. 

9. I trust you
Trust is a foundation to all relationships and you start building trust with you baby as soon as they're born. When they cry, they're trusting you to meet their needs, whether that's to be picked up and soothed, fed, or changed. When you drop them off at daycare in the mornings, they're trusting that you will come back to get them! They look for follow through on promises (or threats) and trust in your word. It also goes the other way, I want my children to know that I trust them too. By trusting in your children, they learn to trust themselves, their inner voice, their intuition, and I want to nurture and strengthen that. Of course my children will make decisions I don't agree with, but I trust that they're continuing to grow and develop and when they're older, no one will know them better than they know themselves. 

10. I’m listening
Each day when we get home from work and over the dinner table we ask Eleanor about her day. When she’s upset or has thrown a tantrum, once she calms down we talk to her about whatever it was that upset her. I often tell her “I’m listening” and “tell me more” so that she knows that I care and that what she has to say is important to me. It give her an opportunity to share her thoughts and feelings and also teaches her the importance of listening.

What are some things you're sure to tell your children? What messages are important to you to teach? I love hearing what other families say and teach, there's so much to learn and new things to do! Please share below!

What's in my Diaper Bag with Huggies!

With Ellie, I packed everything in our diaper bag. If I thought I could maybe, possibly, use it, I stuck it in our diaper bag. Over the last two years, I've learned so much and now with a new little one, I have packing our diaper bag down to a T.

I've learned to really just pack the basics, which could be tucked into a tote bag or large purse, and head out the door. If we're going to be gone for a long time, I'll pack an additional bag to leave in the car- items like jammies, change of shoes, extra diapers and wipes. Wanna see what I have in my diaper bag?

1. Clothing
I always pack a change of clothes for the girls, one set for Ellie and two sets for Emma. I always make sure we have socks, in case something happens to theirs, it gets cold, or as an extra layer under jammies. I also always pack a soft swaddle blanket which serves so many purposes. It's nice to cover up the girls, as an extra layer, to swaddle, to use as a nursing cover in a pinch, or to lay on the ground to let Emma play on.

2. Toys
Depending on your child's age, I pack 1-2 small items to entertain them while we're out. Emma is in love with this elephant and it goes with us everywhere! Other good items to bring are rattles and teethers. If you're child takes a paci, always pack an extra two! Emma won't really take one, but we couldn't carry enough for Ellie when she was young.

3. Diapers and Wipes
The good stuff- diapers, wipes, and rash cream! A good rule of thumb for little babies is one diaper for every two hours you're gone. I have yet to really use this many diapers on a trip, but you just never know! It's better to have too many than too little. My biggest advice it to bring extra wipes! We use two wipes holders, one with our changing mat and one we keep as a spare at the bottom of our bag. We run out of wipes faster than anything else since we use them for so much.

Our diapers of choice from day one with both girls is Huggies. I've found that they fit the best from the very beginning, especially with their umbilical cord cutouts to help with healing. We had the least amount of blow outs and leaks with Huggies, and their wetness indicator is perfect to know when they need a change, especially when you're just adjusting to their feeding habits and establishing a routine.

One time I had to call their customer service line and the representative I spoke with was so nice and friendly. I remember getting off the phone and telling my friends about their exceptional customer service. That call alone really cemented my loyalty to them, they are an awesome company with products that help keep my babies' skin soft and protected.

Another mom tip I have is to buy your diapers in bulk! You go through them so quickly and I've priced them everywhere and I get mine at Sam's (along with popcorn, milk, and other yummy snacks). The girls love getting out of the house and trying samples, checking out their kid stuff, and we always get a snack on our way out. It's been a nice break while I was on maternity leave so sit and talk with Eleanor. What's awesome about being a member is that you can get store pick up or free shipping! Score!

What do you keep in your diaper bag? Any tricks or tips?

5 Things that Didn't Get Easier with a Second Child

Even though Emma is just over three months, motherhood has been so much easier this second time around and I feel like I've been rocking it. Having more knowledge, experience, and an easier baby have made it a whole new world (did you sing that to the Aladdin tune? I typed it to the tune and we've been watching it a ton in our house). So many fears have been quieted, I know what skills to put to use with each cry, and nursing has been awesome. I'm still going with no tears shed! That alone is an accomplishment in and of itself. However, there are a few things that haven't changed and I thought I'd share them with anyone who is expecting or thinking of adding to their brood.

1. The fear of SIDS
With Ellie, I checked constantly for fear of SIDS. She wasn't a sleeper so anytime she slept more than 20 minutes I checked repeatedly that she was breathing. Emma is a sleeper so it totally freaked me out at first, now I may only check a few times a week, but the fear is still there. Sometimes you do everything right, you read all the books, you take the precautions and terrible things still happen. I hope and pray that this never happens and if she hasn't moved or made a peep I may go into her room for a closer look, a finger under her nose to feel for warm breath, and I may or may not have poked her a time or two.

2. Red lights
Emma loves car rides, but if you stay stopped for too long she gets upset. It's inconvenient and you have to tap the brakes and creep to every red light to try and keep the car moving for as long as possible before coming to a complete stop. On a terrible day, you even think about the risk if you just ran that stop sign, just once to make it home with a content infant. I totally forgot about this, until Emma was here and my girlfriends and I all laughed about it.

3. Late night diaper changes
You're tired, your eyes are half open, your contacts are dry as a desert, and you contemplate the 12 hours leak free design your diapers brand promises. It sucks and they are no fun and did not get better the second time around. Included in this as a part b if you will, is blow outs. They also suck.

4. Pumping is the pits
When it comes to feeding your child, I pass no judgment. Nurse, pump, bottle feed, formula, you choose what's best and works for your family. With both of my girls, I've been able to breastfeed them and although it's going so much better this second time around (due to an increase in my supply), pumping still sucks. I hate it. I haven't been as diligent or strict about it this time because I just loathe doing it. I've even woken Emma up to nurse just long enough to keep me comfortable and save me from pumping and I am a strong believer in never waking a baby. Having to tote your pump with you when you're away, storing milk, washing all of the parts, and having to make sure everything you wear is pump friendly is just the pits. I'm thankful we have breast pumps in this day and age and I'm glad I don't have to hand express, but I still find it all terribly inconvenient and hate doing the task every day.

5. The speed of time
It still goes by lightning fast. Knowing how quickly it went by with Eleanor, I tried extra hard to relish in the moments, but they still slipped right through my fingers just as fast, if not faster. This is one of the saddest parts of parenting, it just goes by so quickly. Ellie is getting so big and I know that the time when she'll no longer fit on my lap or be too big to pick up is just around the corner. It breaks my heart to know that she's not always going to be small enough for me to carry her. It's no different the second time, every day Emma gets bigger and new milestones are achieved. Both my girls will be off to college in what I'm sure will feel like a blink of an eye.

These are my top things that didn't get better or easier with experience. Being a parent is so fulfilling, but there's things that just don't change no matter how many times you've done it. I wish I could wave a magical wand and and make the tough times easier, the inconvenient things convenient, and time last longer. What are some things you thought would be different with a second child?

Best Treatment for Diaper Rash

They tell you that each baby is different and it's so true! Emma is calm, loves being passed around from one family member to the next at parties, sleeps a ton, and is really relaxed. A totally different experience from our first baby! Another difference between our girls is Emma's sensitive skin. From the very beginning, she had really sensitive skin and I swear her little perfect cheeks were constantly changing between pink and red. It kind of threw me for a loop because my experience with diaper rash was never a big concern- it always cleared up rather quickly. I've had to learn some new tips and tricks with this little one and I wanted to share my experience like a good mommy blogger!

1. Change diapers often!
This is kind of a no brainer, but sometimes I would wait until the diaper was full or until she pooped to change her. I think everyone does this, but I'm still kind of embarrassed to put it out here. With Emma, probably for about the first month, we would have to change her diaper really often to keep her rash away. As soon as it started to disappear and we slacked, it would come immediately right back. Since rashes can happen at any diaper wearing age, I would suggest changing diapers anywhere between 2-3 hours, or less if you have an infant. This has been the biggest tip to keeping rashes at bay.

2. Change types or skip the wipes
Sometimes, changing brands or types of wipes can be an easy choice to keep away rashes. During Emma's first few weeks we had to switch ours to ones for sensitive skin. When she had a really bad rash that wouldn't go away, we skipped wipes altogether for a soft towel and water.

3. Let them go free
When in doubt, air it out! We haven't had to do this with Emma, but one time with Ellie we just let her be naked for a a while on a towel. It was all we could do to get that little sucker of a rash away! It helps to keep their skin from being rubbed or irritated from the diaper and gives them time to air out.

4. Lay it on thick
Another trick I learned is to slather the rash cream on THICK and often. A lot of it gets absorbed or rubbed into the diaper, so you need to really get a nice layer of cream on their sweet little tushie.The cream that's worked best for Emma is Desitin, it goes on really nice and clears up any signs of rash within a few hours or a day or two (depending on the severity). We use their maximum strength version, since it offers the maximum amount of zinc oxide, go big or go home is our motto. When she has a rash, or even the sign of one coming on, we wipe some cream on her at every diaper change.

If you're in need of some Desitin, or want to try it out for your little one, Target Cartwheel coupon is offering 25% off from 10/25-11/21! It's the perfect time to stock up!

What are some of your best rash tips that helped your babies? What worked the best for you?

Today's post is sponsored by DESITIN® cream, but all experiences and opinions are my own!

Why I Talk, Read, and Sing with my Children Every Day

Growing up, I was always an avid reader and still am today. My mother always took me to the library and read to me every night. One of my favorite memories of my grandmother is sitting on her lap and having her sing silly songs to me. Naturally, this is something that I do with my own children and love the memories we've created and time we spend together.

Although these are simple things, did you know how important they are for your children? Did you know that 90% of your child's brain is developed by age 5? Recent research even shows that more than 80% of a child’s brain is formed by the age of 3!! These first few years are critical for your children and you can set them up for success in easy and free ways! First 5 California has lots of creative and simple ways to incorporate talking, reading, and singing into your lives. Doing activities with your kids helps you to bond with them, create memories, but more importantly it stimulates their brain. Your child's brain is growing at such speed, it's important to take advantage of this precious time and help them absorb language skills, fine and gross motor skills, and help their brain develop!

One routine we've picked up recently, on top of reading 3-5 stories each night at bedtime (along with several songs), is reading time at our local library. Being on maternity leave, I was looking for different ways we could get out of the house each day and reading time is one of the biggest hits with Eleanor! Each week, we head to our library where we're read three books and then do a related craft after.

It's so much fun to watch Ellie get involved when asked questions about what's going on in the books and making a craft afterwards really helps her connect messages from the book. We've read books about colors, mysteries, and opposites so far.

This week we read stories about cows and afterwards made a really simple cow puppet that Ellie loved! She loves showing it off and can't wait to go back next week.

Another activity we love doing together is singing. We sing all kinds of songs (lately it's been ones from Annie), but our favorites are ones that have coordinating hand/body movements. It's really helped Ellie's motor skills, it's been amazing watching her try to mimic my movements to be able to copy them completely! Some of our favorite easy songs to sing is "Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes", "Itsy Bitsy Spider", "If You're Happy (and you know it)", and "Wheels on the Bus".

First 5 California's site has amazing ideas based off your child's age- babies, toddlers, and preschoolers. There's something for everyone and has given me some new ideas for Emma to help stimulate muscle strength, motor skills, and emotional growth. I love the idea of gathering different textures around the house such as fabrics or kitchen utensils to help her sense of touch, visual tracking, and hand-eye coordination. This will also be a fun activity to get Eleanor involved with and help them bond.

Be sure to check out First 5 California for ways you can incorporate Talk.Read.Sing ® to your children each day and check out the Video + Downloads Tab at the top right for ways to turn every day tasks into fun exercises for kids! 

Motherhood 2.0

Since our second baby Emma is now over a month old, I'm obviously a mothering pro. I'm batting two for two so far in keeping all of my offspring alive, fed, and relatively clean and mostly clothed. Being a parent has such a huge learning curve and can sometimes be such an uphill battle. There are days I'm counting down the minutes for bedtime, and other days I feel like Martha Stewart and June Cleaver and I'm rocking it.

When I had Eleanor, I felt like I had been through a hurricane, had survived being trampled by an elephant, been hit by a train, and was only left with half a brain. I had no idea what I was doing and the baby blues had hit me hard (read about my experience with the blues here). It was tough, really, really tough. I wasn't prepared for it and I prayed every day of my pregnancy that this time it would be easier. The power of prayer works my friends!

This time has been so much better and I've been able to enjoy it so much more. I have cried zero times so far! Which that alone I think is monumental. Now, it hasn't been easy every day, but I've learned so much and feel so much more confident and at ease. Here are a few things that have made it better and what I've learned and am putting to use this second time.

- Accept help! 
My sweet and wonderful aunt came in from out of town and stayed with me for an entire week after Matt went to work. I'm beginning to think she is my fairy godmother. I can't express enough how thankful I am for her help and support. It was so much fun and Ellie loved all of the attention from her. We would come home in the mornings from an errand or the park and she would tell me to take the baby and head upstairs for a nap and to not come out before 2pm. It was amazing! Another day, a different aunt came over and went to work on cleaning the house and making lunch. When I had Ellie, I accepted food and that's it. I was too embarrassed and felt like I had to entertain when people came by. Not this time my friends! Want to wash my clothes or mop the floor? Please and thank you.

-The importance of the swaddle
For some odd, odd, reason we didn't swaddle Ellie for very long. Why? Because I had no idea what I was doing. It was also hot as Hades that summer (it was actually record breaking that year) and I hated having to bundle her up. Looking back, I think that was a big mistake on my part. Now, for every nap and bedtime little Emma is in a swaddle and is snug as a bug. She sleeps so much better! Our nights have been fairly easy and I swear it's due to the power of the swaddle.

-Baby Cries
When Ellie cried, I cried. She cried a lot, so therefore, I cried a lot. If she made a squeek, grunt, huff, or growl I picked her up immediately. This time, it doesn't bother me. Of course, I hate listening to Emma cry, but I've realized that she'll be ok if she cries for a few minutes while I finish what I'm doing or tend to Eleanor. I now know that if I take care of what I need to do, I can take care of Emma calmly, without worry, and with a full belly. It's much easier to take care of her when I've taken care of myself. Often times, she fusses for a minute and then goes back to sleep. If I picked her up right away, would she still fall back asleep? I'm not sure.

-I'm not your pacifier!
Nursing in general has been way easier this time, we haven't had any issues with latching or my supply as I did with Ellie, so Emma has been getting a full belly quicker. As soon as she's done eating, she's done. I don't let her pacify on me or play. Eleanor was nearly attached to me all day long, poor thing probably had to be to get enough nutrients, but she also used me as a pacifier for six months. It was all that I could do to soothe her or get her to sleep. Not allowing it to happen the same way this time, plus the combination of other things in this list (like swaddling), have made our lives much easier and we were able to avoid starting bad habits that would be hard to break later on.

-Entertaining the baby
Any time Ellie was awake, I felt that I had to be holding her, singing to her, talking to her, or entertaining her. It was exhausting. Although, it's extremely important to do all of those things with your new born baby, you don't need to do it every. waking. minute. Once, you have multiple children, it's nearly impossible. It's also easier to have a little helper who is so happy to play and sing to her little sister. Every morning and afternoon, Ellie and I play with Emma during her tummy time and during Ellie's nap and when she goes to bed I get some special one on one time with Emma to love on her. This time around, I just don't feel that same pressure to make sure that I'm doing something educational with her every moment. It's much more natural this time and I love being able to have Eleanor included in this time.

-The joy of a sleeping baby
With Eleanor, I never understood how you were supposed to put a baby down while they were drowsy and let them fall asleep on their own. Ellie would only sleep if I nursed her, held her, or pushed her in a stroller. With Emma, it's been a totally different scenario. She doesn't really fall asleep at the breast often and I can just swaddle her and lay her down and she's awake for a few minutes and then falls asleep. Every now and then we'll have to rock her in the Rock and Play, but it's been pretty simple around here. I'm really hoping that this can continue and I'll have a better sleeper now that I know more tricks. 

-They'll survive
As a first time mom, I worried constantly. Are they eating enough? Is this poop normal? What do I do? I had a million questions about everything. Not so much this second time around. I'm not toting every baby related thing with me for every trip out of the house or ditching a full shopping cart in the middle of an aisle to run home because of a screaming infant. I've realized that you don't need every baby gadget, toy, outfit, teether, etc. Your baby will be just fine without every possible baby gear and accessory. I'm also much more attuned to which cry means what, and I know the answers to most of my rookie questions! The anxiety I had is gone and I'm so incredibly thankful that it's been easier my second go around. The baby is easy, keeping Eleanor busy is what's hard!

I read somewhere while I was pregnant that time goes by even faster with a second child and it couldn't be more true. I'm halfway through my maternity leave this week and I can't believe it. It makes me so sad to know how quickly this time has gone by and how it's only going to go faster when I go back to work. There's days I feel like I'm grasping at straws to savor the time with both girls, both together and individually. The dishes, laundry, carpets, can all wait. Babies don't keep and I need to snuggle them a bit longer. Thank goodness it's been easier the second time, I look back and both laugh and cry at my experience. I'm so incredibly thankful for our little family and my sweet girls. I love them both to pieces and each day has been a blessing to spend with them.

What are some of your motherhood lessons you've learned with your children? How

Ellie's Big Sister Gift

In case you missed it.... it's baby week! I know I’ve said this so many times already, but I can’t believe how quickly this pregnancy has flown by. It seriously shocks me how fast time has flown. I was reading an article recently about how life changes when you have your second baby and one of the points that stood out to me was how quickly time goes the second time around. With Eleanor, I truly savored every minute of it. I held her constantly, I took a million pictures, I sang and talked to her, and it wasn’t perfect every day, but I really did relish in the moments. Thankfully, I was there for all of her firsts- first word, crawl, and steps (I’m 99% positive I was there for the firsts, but in the event that I wasn’t, thank you to our wonderful daycare for keeping it a secret so I could enjoy it). Having a second one coming so soon, I am absolutely thrilled and terrified at the same time. I texted my girlfriends about being in the single digits and how all of the emojis capture my feelings- I can’t wait to meet our little girl, I can’t wait to see Eleanor as a big sister, I’m scared about the adjustment to two children, of starting over with the newborn/infant stage, etc.

A few weeks ago, I posted about getting Ellie a Big Sister Gift and had such great ideas and suggestions from your comments- thank you so much. One idea was to not give it to her all at once, but one gift at a time as needed. That seems like such an obvious thing, but I hadn’t thought of it! I was just going to give it all to her at once in the hospital. We didn’t buy her a ton of items, but a few quiet activities to give her as we transition to a family of four. In the book Big Sisters are the Best, it talks about playing quiet games inside or noisy games outside so I chose items that would be great for inside when the baby is napping or I need to buy myself a few minutes of sanity.

Baby Doll and Bottles

I was going to hold off on getting her a doll because she has so many already, but I went ahead and got her another one. As a child, I loved bottles like this where the liquid disappears as the baby “drinks” it all and I know Ellie will enjoy it too. We plan on giving this to her in the hospital, that way she has her own baby to take care of while she visits.

Sticker Books

I bought her several different sticker books (Frozen from Target and the other two from the dollar store!) and I’m hoping that each book will give me about 15 minutes of activity before she moves onto the next activity. The things I can accomplish in that 15 minutes of glorious time includes; shower, do my makeup, fix my hair, pick up the house, solve world peace, I mean the possibilities are endless!

Play Doh

She loves when it’s Play-Doh time at pre-school and we don’t have any at home for her, so I’m excited for her to have something brand new for herself. I think this will be a nice quiet activity to do together.

Frozen Fan

Our Frozen obsession is still going strong and it’s super hot in CA right now, so I figured why not?

Crayons

Ellie loves to color and I love these twistables for her! They don’t break and they’re so easy to stash in my purse or diaper bag to keep her entertained while we’re on the go.

On The Night You Were Born and Madeline

Since we love reading books together, I bought her two special ones. On the Night You Were Born is such a sweet story and I can't wait to snuggle up with Ellie and read it to her. My sister and I always watched Madeline when we were little and when I saw this book I couldn't help but add it to my cart and check out! 

 

So we didn’t get her a whole ton (but more than I remembered as I bought everything separately), but enough items to make sure she knows she’s just as special to us as before and items to keep her busy when the baby needs tending. We have some planned activities for her once the baby arrives to make sure she’s getting attention from Matt and I and some outings with family. I’m really looking forward to our new addition and the transitions happening for our family.

Guest Post: Babbling with the Bogles

Hello Love, Lipstick and Pearls readers! I am a long time follower of Kristen’s blog myself. I just enjoy keeping up to date with her and her adorable family’s life together! Plus, I have gotten some amazing recommendations on beauty and baby products from reading along. I have a blog myself- one that I have admittedly neglected from time to time, BUT if you’d like to know a bit more about me and my family, head over to Babbling withthe Bogle(s). 

 This is us... Troy, Emma and I!

Let me start off by saying that I am an early childhood educator turned stay at home mom. This might help you understand what I want to share with you all today. Like Kristen, I am expecting my 2^nd babe. Sometime between December 25^th and December 30^th we will welcome another sweet member to our family. This go ‘round we didn’t get a due date, we got a due range. I have no idea why, either.

As soon as I found out, I moved into planning mode. One of the first things I considered obsessed over was the best way to get Emma ready for the new kid on the block. Emma was only about 15 months old when we found out we were having another, so really, how would she understand what is going on? I don’t even think she will understand when she is 2 and we have a new baby in the house. To be 100% transparent, I don’t think my husband and I fully understand either.

I immediately started looking for books that could help us introduce the concept of a new sibling. Emma loves books- reading them, handling them, sticking her foot in them and smooshing her toes between the pages. I did quite a bit of research, looking for durable books with simple, engaging messages. I wanted to share some of my finds with you today. I figure it might be a nice resource or starting point for mama’s and families as they are expanding.

I have broken down what I have found into 2 categories: books to prepare for baby and books for after baby is born. Most of the books I have purchased are through Amazon, because I am obsessed with Prime. Again, these are mostly board books, geared for toddlers. There are so many additional resources for older children out there!

Books to prepare for baby:

Hello In There! A Big Sister’s Book of Waiting

This is such an amazing book. The only downside is that there isn’t a version for a big brother. It is a lift the flap book and the pages are nice and durable for a rough and tumble toddler. The mommy’s tummy grows throughout the book, as does the baby. Emma loves lifting the flaps and saying “Hello, baby!”

Waiting for Baby
This book is short, sweet and to the point. Even better, it is under $3! It is a board book so it is perfect for little hands. It is not super rich in content, but it is intriguing and you can certainly interact with it to expand the content. The little child in the book is ambiguous, so it is a perfect little book for a boy or girl!

Global Babies
This book isn’t specifically focused on preparing for a new baby, but it has been a long time favorite in our house. Since starting to read our preparing for babies books, Emma interest in babies has really peaked and she has been wanting to read this book a lot more. I love this book for its simple message and the pictures of diverse babies. If you love this book as much as we do, you can expand your collection to include the Global Baby Girls and Global Baby Boys books! I highly recommend books from The Global Fund for Children!

Families (Babies Everywhere)

This is another book that we already had in our library, but have been pulling out to read more often. This book states common things families do together, like go swimming or share snacks, and then provides a picture of a human family and an animal family doing such things. It is simple and engaging and Emma loves to practice ‘reading’ this one to us!

Books for after baby is born:

I have chosen to save these books to share with Emma, after our new baby is here. I figured she might make more connections with the content as she is experiencing it herself.

My New Baby

This is by the same author as Waitingfor Baby. The formatting is very similar- short, sweet and to the point. There are other books in this series, however these are the only 2 I have purchased thus far

I Am a Big Sister

I love this author! She writes simple books with engaging pictures and lyrical text. This book is no exception! I haven’t been able to find a big brother version of this book, however, I haven’t really scoured too hard.

I’m a Big Sister

This is a book from the perspective of a new big sister. It doesn’t just focus on all the positive aspects of having a new sibling, which is what I like most about it. However the central message is sweet and true- mommies and daddies have a lot of love to give to their families. There is a boy version of this book, as well, although I have not checked that out.

I’m a Big Brother  
We aren’t going to find out if we are having a boy or girl. We held out on our first pregnancy and it was really the best experience and surprise! Since we won’t know the sex, I have been limited in buying some books for after the baby is born. Here are some other books that I am considering purchasing once we have the new baby:

Brothers

Sisters

You’re Getting a Baby Brother

You’re Getting a Baby Sister

And FINALLY, if you have stuck around this long, hooray! I have saved the resource I am MOST excited about for last! If you haven’t checked out Twigtale, please, please do! It is a website in which you can personalize pre-written stories (written by child development experts) with your own pictures!!

I ordered the book Becoming a Big Sister for Emma and WE LOVE IT!! One thing I should mention, is that these books are not board books. My Emma is quite rough with her books and I believe in letting her explore and handle the books. The first book didn’t last long before a couple of pages fell out. I contacted Twigtale and they had a new book printed and in the mail for me the very next day. They followed up with an email and I told them about how much I LOVE the content of the book but worried about how long it would last us and they sent us another free book! Needless to say, their customer service is AMAZING.

So now I have 2 copies of the book. I put one aside for Emma to read and look at when she is older. In the other book I used my top secret book reinforcement process. It is really fancy people, I put plain ole’ clear packing tape in the spine of each page. This copy is the one I let Emma interact with. She loves looking at the pictures of herself. I plan on personalizing the I Have A New Sibling book once our new baby is here!

Those are the books that we have or plan to get for Emma once the baby is here. Seriously, this is just a small fraction of what is available out there! If you have any sibling book recommendations please share them with us!

Thank you so much Amanda for your guest post! I love all these suggestions and have bought I’m a Big Sister,  My New Baby, and Big Sisters are the Best! and we really enjoy reading them. Ellie loves to have them read to her repeatedly each night and point out things for the baby in the books. I think it's really helped her grasp the concept of big sister and baby a bit more. We'll have to snag a few more of these books for after the baby is here! Good luck with your little ones!

A Big Sister Gift?

Since getting pregnant, I knew Ellie would be a great big sister, but I'm completely aware of the adjustment she's going to face when she realizes the baby stays with us forever and not just for a visit. Right now she gets all of our attention and we can meet all of her needs pretty much on demand. I know that sounds like we spoil her and we don't, but compared to how it will be when the baby arrives it's totally going to be a whole new world for her. I have some fears about not being able to pick her up when she needs or wants me to, getting the girls on the same nap schedule, finding a schedule at all that works for us, and any negative feelings Ellie will be going through as she adjusts such as jealousy.

We've been reading several big sister and baby books to her and she's obsessed with babies when we're out and her dolls at home, but just like how you can't truly prepare for parenthood, I don't think we can fully prepare her for her little sister. One idea I've been wanting to do is have a gift ready from the baby for Ellie with a note to her. I realize this isn't a new idea, my mom gave me a new dolly when my sister arrived and she said I didn't even care about the baby and just played with the doll for most of the visit. Although, there were some pretty cute pics of me holding Karli, so I obviously had the big sister thing down from the start.

I've been looking through Pinterest (follow me here!) for some ideas and I think a little activity sack with quiet time activities might be the best route for her. I want to fill it with items she loves and some new items she doesn't have. Here's what I'm thinking:

Coloring Books

Crayons

Stickers

Play-Doh

Doll Sling

Pretend Makeup

Snacks

I don't want to go too crazy, but I want her to have something special. I thought about getting her a doll like my mother did for me, but she has so many dolls and I want her to have a gift that she will enjoy. Maybe I could add a My Little Pony?

Mamas- did you have your little ones exchange gifts? What did they give each other? How did it work for your children?  What are your tips and ideas? All ideas and input are welcome!

Our Breastfeeding Journey

Our breastfeeding journey was such a roller coaster and I’m so thankful that I was able to nurse Eleanor for as long as I did. We went a whole fourteen months and I loved the bond that it helped us form and loved holding her close to me, but we hit some lows along the way. I wanted to first share our story a few months ago, this post is nearly an entire year late, but I thought it would be best to wait until we were done when I would have to time to look back and reflect on what it meant to me (and us) and how I dealt with the struggles when I wasn’t in the trenches of pumping and nursing.It's also been on my mind with the upcoming arrival of our second child and I have such mixed feelings about doing it again. I definitely want to, but now I realize it's not as simple as I expected it to be.

Since getting pregnant I knew I wanted to nurse my baby, it just seemed to be the easiest and most natural path for me. I immediately signed up for all of the classes my health provider offered. I didn’t read any books about it because I figured it would be a stroll in the park for us- oh she’s hungry? Just put her to your breast! Around that same time, Julia of Girl in the Red Shoes started featuring bloggers’ journeys with breastfeeding and I learned it was going to be a little tougher than I first Imagined. I guess I just never thought about the intricacies of supply, latching, or the possibilities of infection. I figured I’d learn more from the class I signed up for, but after the class I was really disappointed. They went over breastfeeding in the most basic of terms that would only be a benefit to someone who had no idea about the concept in general. One thing that I was hoping to learn more about was pumping! How the heck does it work, when do you do it, and what do you do with the milk afterwards. I eventually learned the ropes of that too though.

Fast forward to Ellie’s birth when we were wheeled over to the quiet room for bonding, Ellie latched right away and nursed for nearly an hour. Then throughout our hospital stay, whenever she was hungry I would nurse her and she would latch right away and it was beautiful. I was so thankful that we were starting off on the right foot. Before leaving, I sat with two lactation specialist and they praised my every move and said I was a natural! We practiced different nursing holds and away I went thinking this would be one of the easiest jobs of motherhood. Ha ha.

My milk came in five days after she was born and things were all honky dory, I’d feed her on demand and she was having regular bowel movements. After a few weeks, I was exhausted and worn out from nursing 24/7. Ellie would nurse for hours, she was constantly falling asleep at the breast, and if she was upset the only thing we could do to calm her was to nurse. I never understood how sleep deprivation could be used as a torture tactic in war until I had an infant. After about four weeks I made an appointment with a lactation consultant and we discovered through weighed feedings that I was making about 1-2 ounces less than needed in order to give Eleanor a full tummy. I felt terrible. No wonder she nursed all the time and cried a lot- poor girl was starving! I felt like such a failure and was embarrassed that I didn’t realize it sooner. I wasn’t ashamed to supplement with formula, in fact I was thankful formula existed and she could get the nutrients she needed. I was disappointed in myself (which I realize now is ridiculous). I was watching what I was eating, nursing on demand, drinking water, I started taking supplements to help give my milk supply a boost and it was all helping, but I couldn’t shake the feeling of not having enough. Luckily, Ellie took to a bottle and went back and forth between bottle and breast easily. I also worried about that as well! I didn’t want to give her a bottle too soon and I didn’t want her to refuse the breast because the bottle was easier to eat from.

We had to supplement her feedings for about 2 weeks before I was able to produce enough milk on my own. I was so happy to finally be where she needed me to be and thought things were looking up. To keep up my milk supply and create a small stash, I pumped after she went to bed, woke up around 2am to pump, and then pumped again at 5am. I did this for months. I was so tired! I finally was able to stop my midnight pump session, but would start that back up anytime my supply dipped. When I went back to work, I still pumped after she went down and woke up extra early to pump again. Then I pumped three times while at work and it would only give me enough milk for one day at daycare!

There were a lot of times I felt like giving up or switching to only formula, but I felt like it was such a small sacrifice that I could keep going. My main goal was to pump for one year, but with how difficult it had been I broke it up to nurse for three months, 6 months, 9 months, and then a year. Every milestone I met kept me motivated to keep going. I only have X amount of months left, I can do it! Seeing how close I was with Eleanor, how attached she had become to me, and seeing how healthy she was (she only had one cold!) were all benefits to the choice I had made for our family. I loved to nurse her, to hold her close, to know that the chunky thighs had come from nourishment that I provided to her.

With a new baby on the way, I'm really looking forward to nursing again, but I'm not going to be so hard on myself or beat myself over about it. I still have the same main goal of nursing for a year and plan to focus more on my diet to hopefully help my supply. I loved nursing and I'm excited to build that bond again with our little one.

How was your breastfeeding experience? What choices worked best for you?

Breaking the Paci Addiction

Last week we ditched the paci. We said goodbye, braced ourselves for meltdowns and long nights, and tried not to look back. Matt has hated the paci for months and has been wanting to get rid of it, but I kept telling him that Ellie wasn't ready yet. Now I realize that I wasn't ready for it. It was a small thing that kept her a "baby" still, when she was really upset it always soothed her, and if I'm completely honest it worked really well as a mute button when needed. I did want to ditch it well before our second baby arrived and Matt said this was the week.

We had last week off work and Ellie's molars were coming in, so if she was going to be fussy anyways, why not ditch the pacis now? I had pinned all kinds of different tips from Pinterest, talked to my cousins and friends about it, and we decided to just go cold turkey. Here's how it all went down...

Day 1: Tuesday morning we let her have her paci throughout the morning (she usually gets rid of it on her own around breakfast for the day) and we headed to the zoo. We had an extra one in the backpack, but she was fussy once we got to the zoo so we just went for it right then and there and told her we didn't have it anymore. It was epic. She screamed and screamed and we did our best to calm her down. We ate snacks, distracted her, relaxed in the shade, but decided to just head home.

This was the worst day, mostly because her molars were really bothering her and once we were home we ate some popsicles, turned on the bubble machine, and stayed outside. She napped on the way home without her paci in the car and I was terrified about how the night would go. We were outside in the sun for a few hours, ran some errands, ate dinner, and then relaxed into a movie (she's obsessed with the Despicable Me's right now), once bedtime hit she was so exhausted. We went upstairs, put her in her crib and she just rolled over without a fight and slept through the night. It was a success!

Day 2: She woke up at her typical time and was looking for her paci on the ground, thinking she had tossed it out during the night (the usual). When I told her we didn't have it anymore she cried and asked for it for 10 minutes and then was over it. She didn't mention it again. We kept her busy and outdoors, blueberry picking, exploring downtown, and eating lunch. She took her nap a bit later than normal, but went to sleep fine. She asked for it at bedtime and cried for her paci "Mine! Mine! Mine!", but we let her cry it out a whole 10 minutes then she gave up the fight and passed out. She did wake up around 4am and we brought her to bed with us where she slept great.

Day 3: We were on a roll at this point! She napped great, asked for her "mine" at naptime, looked for it and when we told it they were all gone she gave a quick pout face and was over it. The rest of the day was a breeze, she didn't ask for her paci at all, no meltdowns, and slept perfectly.

Day 4: Another great day. I couldn't believe it was going so well. She napped great, had tons of fun during the day playing with her cousins, we took them to a jump house, she napped liked a champ, went swimming, and passed out again like a light when it was bedtime.

Day 5: She found a paci. We were dead. I saw her with it and my heart sank. She was playing in the formal living room  and found one somewhere (they're always lost no matter how many we had found or bought, those dang little suckers!), and came running up the stairs with the biggest grin to show Matt and I. Her whole body language and expressions were like "look mom/dad, I found one! They're not all gone!!". We told her then that she was too old and couldn't have one anymore and to put it in the trash can. She didn't, but after a few minutes she put it away on her own and we threw it out. There was no fuss over it and she didn't ask for it again. She napped and slept great that day too. I was so afraid that finding that paci would put us back at square one and am so thankful she gave it up without a fight or bribery.

We totally kicked the paci all because of my husband. I never would have done it even though I knew we had to ditch it. I wasn't ready for it, I was scared it would be a traumatic experience, and I didn't think Ellie was ready either. I truly believe in knowing your children and when they're ready to do things. However, this was a huge lesson to me on that balance of knowing your children are ready for something and when to give them the push to be ready. As a parent, you want to teach your children, lead by example, and push them to reach their full potential. You want to give them the tools they need to reach their goals, to over come obstacles, and not to give up.

That may sound a bit deep just for breaking a toddler of their paci, but it really made me realize so much. I'm so happy that my husband stood his ground and said we're doing it. I was never going to be brave enough until it was too late and an even harder of a habit to break. Ellie did so good and really surprised me with how resilient children are.

If you're thinking about doing the same, here is the little advice I have to share:

-Start taking the paci away from them at first at certain times. Use it only for when they sleep, long car rides, etc.

-Then when you're ready to kick it totally, my advice would be to go cold turkey and keep them distracted. Every day we had activities planned, kept her busy, and she was having too much fun to worry about her paci and too tuckered out to put up much fight at night. It wasn't as big of a change to go without a paci since she typically didn't have it all day long, but to 100% honest, when we were home and she wanted it, I gave it her to her plenty of times.

-Once you take it away, you gotta stick to it. You can't give in to the screaming or crying. Do your best to soothe them another way and get them distracted.

-If you think it would help, maybe find another item that they could soothe themselves with. Eleanor already sleeps with 300+ dolls at night to cuddle, so that wasn't an option for us, but maybe if she didn't we would have gone that route.

What did you do to kick your child's bad habit? What are your tips to other mommies?

Parenting Rites of Passage

There are moments in life that make you step back and think, I just went through a rite of passage. Growing up, it's things like getting a phone in your room, getting to stay up an hour later, then getting a license, having your first heartbreak, an acceptance letter to college and so on.

As a parent, these rites of passage still continue. There's several of them and they keep going forever into grandparenthood. Here are some of the few that I've experienced so far, including the one that happened this weekend.

1. Having a baby
Doesn't matter how you brought this baby into the world, whether it's from hours and hours of pushing, having them cut from your abdomen via a c-section, or from traveling and filling out endless paperwork to make them yours. The point is that they're yours. You fought for them, you prayed for them, you went into this thing filled with fear, excitement, and most of all love.

2. The first all-nighter
Some people get babies who sleep through the night (I've only known this joy for the last 5 months) and others get babies who are up every few hours, or your baby is sick, or whatever the reason. The first few times you're up all night long feeding them, rocking them, singing lullabies, etc. I remember the nights when I wanted to cry (and often I did) where I would think to myself that these are the nights I'll remember and how much I would want them back when they were gone and how I would miss how little she was at that moment in time.

3. The blowout
It's disgusting and smelly and you don't know where to start with clean up. Or how to take off their onesies or if you should just cut it off and toss it away. Just so you know, you take it off from the top down, thank you Pinterest, although it was too late when I learned this. When this blow out happens, and it's all up their back, and dripping, and smelly, you've just gone through a rite of passage. Welcome.

4. Their first...
There are lots of firsts for children- their first crawl, step, word, kiss, etc They're all amazing experiences. They fill you with joy, tears, pride and it's so fulfilling and gives you a little pat on the back that something you're doing is right. All of the teaching, helping, love, and support you showered on them is working! Woohoo!

5. The sickness
Ellie has had very few illnesses (thanks heavens); a little cold, HFM with only three spots, and a few fevers (mostly from teething), but this weekend was the first real sickness. It was disgusting, smelly, and I don't want to get too much TMI, but Matt and I were up in the middle of the night cleaning her up and her bed. Once we got her back to sleep between us (so her room could air out) we looked at each other and high fived. Dead serious. It was a total rite of passage, I knew it would be coming one day and this weekend was it. We nursed her back to health and took it on together as a team.

Being a parent is sometimes an uphill battle, but it's so much fun. All of the hard times and the happy times make for such memories and good stories to retell later. I've loved every moment of this journey and the rites of passage I've experienced. I love the support that motherhood brings to us, that we're all in it together, although some women judge instead of love, but tut-tut to them because they're missing out! It's a job you can't call in sick to, you come out bruised and your heart bursts over and over for a number of different reasons, but it has to be the most fulfilling thing I've ever done. 

What are some of your most memorable rites of parental passage? What was hardest or easiest for you?